Josh and Ryan went on a gigantic shopping spree yesterday…the tragedy was that I was not a part of it. I was too busy dealing with wretched teenage angst at work. Basically this 17 year old co-worker decided to hate me, and the rest is history. I forgot what it feels like to be hated by a disgruntled teen…it’s been at least ten years, really. It got so bad that I actually tried to make things difficult for her. For example: Teen passive-aggressively says, “Do you want me to take this customer?” I say, “Sure, if you don’t mind.” She literally expels a ‘huff’ and marches off as if her life is over, rewarding me with the silent treatment for three hours. Needless to say, it became a very long day…and I was actually kind of miffed. I’m used to people liking me, or at least being nice to my face. This huffy, snooty, angry teen thing is something I’m not familiar with. Suddenly I felt really bad, like, what’s wrong with me? And than I realized that I was being transported to a the distant past, the feelings welling up inside were similar to how I felt in the girl’s locker room in 8th grade: Lost, ugly, and unliked. It took a while to snap back from yesterday’s work day.
Josh and Ryan, however, were riding a high only two men can get when getting back from a successful shopping trip. Both of them have elevated their activity level and have been pursuing fitness by way of weekly basketball games. This means that they actually needed to invest in practical sport socks, sturdy shoes, and of course, sweatbands. Below is a picture of Ryan modeling his new sweatbands, PLUS a custom made skull bracelet I made for him for his birthday. This is my veiled attempt to promote a new ‘men’s line’ of glass jewelry…notice the masculine square gems, the black and white skulls, and the modest amount of flair the bracelet adds to the overall look:

One of my favorite childhood pictures of Josh is his Freshman Basketball picture, the one without his team, just him in his gear posed with the ball. This is Josh, wearing new basketball shoes, recreating the picture some 15 years later, (complete with adolescent sneer):

It should be further noted that we took this madcap energy to downtown Seattle where we continued the shopping buzz and went to Nordstrom. I made Ryan follow me up multiple floors to show him the illustrious Juicy Couture…only to have him be grossly disappointed by the line. I had hoped I was being helpful, what with Ryan having a new wife and all…turns out Ryan has no interest in his wife cavorting around in terry cloth tracksuits, something I found myself excusing away and yet secretly despising myself. The three of us ended up at the Mac counter looking at lip ‘glass.’ Ryan and Josh ended up embarrassing me in front of the hot sales girl and were eventually banished to the hat and accessory section while I continued to peruse the Mac line. Classic comment of the night came from the Mac girl herself: “Oh, it’s not a big deal, I have two younger brothers and they always goof off and make fun of stuff while I’m at work.” I didn’t have the heart to tell her that I was actually married to one of the alleged ‘brothers’ I was hanging out with, although it did confirm my feelings that when Ryan, Josh, and I hang out it feels like being married to two siblings.