I sit here, hoping the powerful effects of airborne will seep into my system and keep all the gunk, germs, and cookie slobber from invading my delicate immune system. On Friday we gathered in the main area with all six kindergarten classes and their parents and sang songs. Than we went back to our classrooms and devoured homemade cookies and milk. I have to admit, the kid’s songs were catchy. I found myself swaying and shaking to the classics, “I’m Gonna Shake My Sillies Out” being my favorite. I also rediscovered the classic tale of Abiyoyo, a book we had on tape as kids. It was narrated by the author, complete with sing-a-long. How nice to hear the story told, twenty years later to a new batch of kids. Remembering parts of my own childhood usually happens when I discover books I loved in kindergarten still there and alive in the classroom. We forget so much of that relatively short part of our lives, the part where we were little…seems like I’ve been an adult forever and than I’ll come across Steven Kellogg’s tale of Pecos Bill–I loved that book!
The little boys who spit on a co-worker of mine moved on to the Spanish Teacher on Friday. Not only did he spit on her, but he bit her as well. The boy was sent home. The faculty rallied together, trying to figure out how to support the parents, the boy, and the slowly growing club of teachers who have collectively been spat on by this child over the past year and half. You’d think we’d all be furious at this boy, but that’s the nice thing about this school. They want nothing but to help him…turns out he’s got a lot of troubles and when he’s not angry he’s sweetly giving me love letters. I walked passed his personal conference with his teachers and the principal…he was crying. I’m sure he doesn’t have the language yet, at four-years-old, to communicate why he spit on the Spanish teacher.
It still hurts me when these kids cry…I’m not immune to it yet. One of my students fell on the playground, knocking the wind out of her and biting her lip. She was carried inside by another teacher. She was crying and her little sleeve was all bloody from holding her hand up to her mouth. We patched her up and gave her a popsicle to ease the swelling. I walked her back to our classroom for the remainder of recess. When I tried talking to her she told me, “I knocked the wind out of my body…I don’t feel like talking.” So I left her sucking on her popsicle and reading a book. (Why can’t they all be that good?)
Friendships still remain tense between several students. The four-year-old girls are commanded to be last in line during follow-the-leader. They share this responsibility by holding hands. The leader is always a five-year-old. They create complex games where the four-year-olds are always last and sometimes they are pit against each other. Because we are largely responsible for these kids’ social growth, there is nothing much we can do. Instead I observe these endless follow-the-leader games and wonder when the littler ones are going to rise up and revolt. Occasionally the strongest of the four-year-old crew will freak out at another in her clan–”Stop holding my hand!”–which results in a slapfest and eventual crying. The Wise Leader will try to intervene, but usually it’s more than her five-year-old mentality can handle. A teacher is called to resolve the issues between the fighting four-year-olds.
I don’t think this job is for me…meaning I can’t imagine doing this next year. I might be wrong, of course. But the level of exhaustion, not to mention illness that I feel constantly is kicking my ass. However, I feel that I’m relatively good at this difficult job, and that makes me feel a lot of satisfaction. I learned that ten other people interviewed just in my Lead Teacher’s room alone. The fact that I beat out all these people really gives me strength when I feel like I suck at teaching. When do I feel like I suck? When I don’t know how to discipline a kid for hitting another one…when I don’t know the language to use…when the parents ask me hard questions. But I’m constantly discovering new parts, new things, and having great conversations with people under the age of six.