I’ve spent the last week doing a couple of things. First of all, I dived right into a modern dance intensive: Monday through Friday, 6-10 for three weeks. I just completed my first week, and yes, the pain is there. Going from one leisurely ballet class a week (if that) to full on throwing your body down on the floor, rolling around, leaping and then landing on your knees every single night for five days straight has definitely taken its toll. However, it’s fantastic and engaging and challenging. I’m relearning all sorts of new things, incorporating old ideas, and meeting new people. The last two hours of each night are dedicated to solely working on choreography with a guest choreographer–a fellow I worshipped in college, actually. I was telling Josh how surreal it is to be taking class from this amazing teacher again, seven years later as an older, wiser, married individual. Even back then he was well out of my league, but I was such a spastic, fanatic, mess back in college…it’s nice to take my well established experience and apply it to his technique.
I also quit coffee. I did this for a variety of reasons, primarily for some personal health problems and the fact that I had gotten really addicted to caffeine as a result of my manic teaching schedule. I tried cheating a little with decaf, but it didn’t make me feel great, so out it went. (With the removal of alcohol eight months ago I haven’t been this straight edge since high school). Many of you know how much I love coffee and how truly and deeply difficult it has been to let it go. I was recently reading a comic book written by a woman trying to get over alcoholism and I kept noticing parallels. OK, so it’s not like I drank five cups a day, we’re talking about one measly latte in the morning. However, it got to the point where I didn’t even enjoy it anymore; I was just fueling the habit. Anyway, I did everything I could to avoid quitting, it wasn’t until my doctor asked in an incredulous voice, “Are you STILL drinking coffee?” that I finally buckled down. I had a headache for a week…and I felt really slow…and it’s everything I can do to avoid walking into a shop and ordering two shots of espresso over ice–my favorite summer drink!
I also don’t like my job. It’s for the usual reasons, I won’t go into it here, but let’s just say I went from teaching four classes to one. It doesn’t feel worth it, (certainly not financially), and I’m back to looking…which really saddens me to be back in this position again. Sometimes I feel so mad at myself for not having any sort of ‘career’ laid out, something I could just plug into whenever I needed to switch jobs. (Sigh). If anyone hears of something, let me know…