I’ve realized that my husband’s approach to grocery shopping is a great commentary on how we individually approach food. Sure, there is the guise of responsibility: the milk is organic, the cereal is whole wheat, and the weird swiss cheese triangles he found are billed as having 30% less fat. But the naughty stuff has still been slipped in: Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup cereal, Oreos, and chips. Even when Josh accompanies me to Trader Joe’s the organic Pop Tarts still make it into the basket. It used to be in CO our only option was Safeway…now that we live in Seattle a whole array of food stores are available–from the hippie grocery store a mile from our house to the much beloved Trader Joe’s.

Now Safeway is convenient, a mere five blocks from our house and boasts a newly remodeled produce section, huge sprawling aisles, and the most dangerous parking lot in Seattle. The last time I was there commercials screamed at me half the time I was shopping–which I found deeply offensive. I’m already supporting your store, the last thing I need to hear is tinny advertisements over the loud speakers while I shop. Therefore when I must resort to Safeway I usually send Josh.

This is risky…usually I try and tell him to shop conservatively–I’ll be going to TJ’s later that week–but inevitably Josh makes up for lost shopping opportunities by buying freely. He strays from the list, supplementing the bananas with waxy, non-organic, Argentinian apples. He buys in large quantities because once he finds something he loves, Josh does not want to risk being out of it–therefore we now have six boxes of whole wheat crackers (which incidentally contain the same amount of saturated fat as Oreos). Cans of soup in abundance arrive in our cupboard for those late nights when I’m not home and Josh needs dinner. Ice cream shows up, a pint of whole milk, and six boxes of cereal (from Special K to Cocoa Puffs).

Bless his heart, in reaction to my uptight approach towards food, he’s gotten better. We both read labels and have been known to stand side by side in an aisle looking at the ingredient list of two different boxes of mac and cheese. (”I’ve got 200 mml of sodium, how about you?” “250 mml!” “No way, how big is you serving size?”) But his attempts, while with the best of intentions, are no where near to what I might actually buy. How can I tell him that, while Special K does have some fiber in it, the amount of sugar and over-processed bullshit about weight loss on the package discount the minimal health benefits? I prefer the off brands, specifically Trader Joe’s minimally packaged cold cereal with their unassuming list of ingredients and high fiber count. I’ve ruled out corn syrup for the unassuming cane juice, swapped fluffy rice cereals for the stomach-filling sticks and twigs, and made the switch to non-fat milk 2 years ago. Sure, I get made fun of when I truck home the shredded wheat (”You’re becoming just like your Dad!”) but I’ve steered clear from puffed rice and anything that has zero sugar (Styrofoam cereal we used to refer to it as a kid). Some of this was in reaction to my high cholesterol reading last year–all the research pointed to a hearty fiber diet as a way to clean out your arteries (and your gullet). Part of it is that as I grow older, I find that I can’t stand the extremely sweet or the over salted. My sister actually commented on my under salted cooking when she lived with me. I always figure people can just salt to taste and, while the salt shaker still stands dutifully next to the stove, I’ve found myself turned off by super salty dishes (specifically in restaurants and even more specifically: the soup).

Do I steer away from the center aisles? Hell no. I love packaged and processed food as much as the next red blooded American. I revel in frozen pizza (fire pit baked, shipped from Italy to Trader Joe’s), boxed mac and cheese (no preservatives, 5 ingredients, supplemented with boiled broccoli), and ice cream (1/3 less fat, custard style, from Breyers). And while this post may seem to tease my husband, I’m actually making fun of myself a little bit….seriously.