We have a rooster in our neighborhood, just down the block. He belongs to a family who lives in an unattractive ’snout house’ (the garage is right out in front, obscuring the front door on the side). The rooster and his matronly chicken wives stroll around freely on their property–’cage free’ I believe they call it. Occasionally, he’ll pause from picking at the dirt and let out a classic cock-a-doodle-doo. Then he’ll continue clucking and picking as if it’s completely normal for him to be ‘free as a bird’ in a grungy city neighborhood. Sometimes I’ll hear him while I”m working outside, and believe me, that sucker is LOUD. I’ll fantasize that I actually live in the country, and he is my rooster in my imaginary barn.

None of this is very novel at 5:45am in the morning. I wear earplugs but, alas, Josh does not. Tragically, he’s been waking up at 5:45am all summer long at the rooster’s cue. Part of this is we have our windows open, part of this is that Josh already has to get up pretty early and is tuned in to early morning rising, and part of it is that having an unnaturally loud rooster crowing in the morning is distracting. On weekends this is very hard for my husband: “I spent two years in Brazil living alongside roosters, I can’t believe I’m doing it here in Seattle.”

One time we walked past this house and saw the rooster in question sauntering around his driveway with what looked like a child bride–a very small chicken. Josh immediately launched in to a master plan to bring the rooster down. Perhaps we could borrow someone’s dog and, at an opportune moment, unleash it on the rooster. Or maybe a well placed pellet gun at far range could bring the cock down. I suggested Hobbes–but quickly realized this particularly rooster dwarfed my cat in size.

This morning Josh woke up and yelled, “I’m going to kill that rooster!” He got out of bed, put on shoes, and marched down the street to get the address of the offender. Then he promptly called animal control. Surprisingly, he filed a complaint without any hassle. On Animal Control’s website they go on and on about how neighbors have to work it out themselves. “Have you tried talking it out before bothering Animal Control?” the website suggests. “We are so busy with cock fights, killer pitbulls, and abandoned puppies we don’t seem to have ANY time for barking dogs.” Josh explained that there isn’t much to ‘talk out’ when your neighbor owns a rooster and that he wanted to make an anonymous complaint.

Shockingly, no one else has filed a complaint against these neighbors. Talks are underway about putting together a rooster campaign on the block. (“Tired of rising at 5:45am at the rooster’s crow? Call this number and file a complaint”). The folks down the street have 8-10 business days to respond to our lone complaint. If nothing changes we can file a second complaint. I’m sure if more people called in we’d have greater strength in numbers. In the meantime, I’m very impressed with Josh. My attitude had always been: “Well, the rooster may be loud, but at least he’s not some gang member blasting the bass while washing his car.” Few things erk my husband…and a rooster will do it every time.