Baby is slowly running out room. I felt his feet for the first time–meaning, I could tell they were feet instead of something mysteriously unidentifiable. I poked and prodded the place where I felt his feet; I made Josh reach over me in the car to feel them and then I made my stomach muscles a little sore. “Stop poking him!” Josh protested the next day after I complained of soreness but continued the search for the mysterious feet.

Hiccups from baby also amuse me–except the night I was trying to sleep. For the first time, I felt genuine annoyance over something as cute as prenatal hiccups. So distracting! Can’t he tell I’m beyond tired? Birth and Delivery classes are coming up this Saturday…I expect we’ll be studying pain management techniques by holding ice cubes and chanting numbers. I think it will help both Josh and I but it will also be weird.

Up until recently, I was always able to lie on my back. In fact, I rejected the whole notion that pregnant women should only sleep on their left sides–bullshit, really. As the months wore on I found myself able to sleep on my back if my knees were bolstered and my back was stuffed with pillows. I created a mini-recliner in my bed. This worked really well. When lying on my side, my stomach kind of flops over and becomes really uncomfortable–despite the body pillow. (I tried naming the body pillow “Enrico” but Josh adamantly discouraged this). Two nights in a row, my beloved sleeping position has been compromised. When I lay on my back I can almost feel Baby Schlag sink back into my spine, wriggling in protest, no matter how many pillows I use. This is terrible. This makes sleeping really limited. This makes me want to throw a tiny temper tantrum.

Of course, sleeping has always been weird–it goes hand in hand with pregnancy. On any given night you might find me eating a bowl of cereal at 4am. Or you might find me reading a book to try and fall back to sleep at 5:30am. Expect several trips to the bathroom–usually at 12am, 3am, and 6am. I try snuggling Josh, but the body pillow is too bulky. He tries snuggling me and the body pillow is somehow tangled in his legs. I try and snuggle Josh without the pillow and my stomach lurches and protests. One night Josh could feel Baby Schlag kicking him in the back, protesting the side sleeping position we had found ourselves in.

With each week during the third trimester, it seems that something is taken away. My belly button’s good looks one week, my chin last week, next week I expect to lose something else…but dang, did sleeping my back really need to be taken away?